A home ripped apart by one spouse leaving reverberates with a host of unanswered questions. Simple answers don't exist—heartrending complexities do. In the midst of the turmoil, reconciliation may seem out of reach. But there is still hope for those who are willing to fight for their marriages.
In this transformative guide, men and women who are separated but hopeful for restoration will discover life-changing truths about God, themselves, and their marriages. Linda W. Rooks explores practical answers for men and women in the midst of a marriage crisis, guiding them step by step toward hope and a positive outcome, even when fighting for the marriage alone.
After finding hope, strength, and encouragement for their marriages in Rooks's first book, Broken Heart on Hold, many readers continue on their journeys with new questions as they take the next step. Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated begins where Broken Heart on Hold left off, continuing to guide readers through the labyrinths of separation, this time with practical answers to their questions.
From diving into topics such as relationship dynamics and healing, protecting children, and praying for restoration, to deciding on boundaries and learning to live with the same spouse in a new marriage, Rooks illustrates what reconciling and rebuilding a marriage looks like—and how the sweet intimacy of Christ is in the waiting.
Through biblical wisdom, the personal experience of navigating toward her own marital restoration after a three-year separation, and eleven years of ministry to marriages in crisis, author Linda W. Rooks offers hope to many who feel hopeless by sharing true stories, practical answers, and Scripture-based truth to guide readers along their journeys toward wholeness.
"I love the stories and the vulnerability with which Linda shares from her own experience and leads us readers to Jesus! I especially like the practical 'Heart Work' at the end of each chapter. I will be recommending it to all my married clients!"
Roger Shepherd, President and Director of Florida Counseling Foundation; senior supervisor in the counseling program, Reformed Theological Seminary
"A marriage doesn't deteriorate overnight nor is it rebuilt in a day—but how do you rebuild? What do you do while standing in the midst of the wounds and wreckage of a separation? In this impactful book, Linda Rooks brings wise, compassionate, and practical insight for a couple trying to piece together a broken relationship."
Matt Heard, Lead Pastor of Northland Church, Orlando, Florida; author of Life with a Capital L: Embracing Your God-Given Humanity
"Linda shares what she learned in her own separation and reconciliation and what she has learned from others. We especially appreciate the practical suggestions for walking a messy road rife with various opinions on how to best proceed. The insights into a healthy reconciliation process will be invaluable to those on that path. This is a great resource we will recommend."
Gary & Mona Shriver, Authors of Unfaithful: Hope and Healing after Infidelity; cofounders of Hope & Healing Ministries, Inc.
"Marriage on the rocks? Wondering if you are the only one who cares about your marriage? Linda Rooks has written HOPE and HELP into your future! This book is a healing balm for one of life's very unwelcome, unwanted, and unbelievably difficult journeys. It's a must-read for anyone finding themselves struggling to hold on to his or her marriage."
Pam Farrel, Author of forty-five books including bestselling Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti; codirector of Love-Wise
"Practical, powerful, confidence-building, and enlightening describe this book by Linda Rooks. Her wisdom is greatly needed and will embolden those who feel lost and hopeless in the midst of marital separation and abandonment. As lay counselors, we will be recommending Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated knowing it will give others biblical hope in God's care and the Holy Spirit's empowering."
Kathy Collard Miller and Larry Miller, Lay counselors, speakers, and authors of many books including Never Ever Be the Same
"Powerful! Practical! Biblical! Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated walks couples step by step through separation to possible reconciliation. Linda Rooks, with a heart filled with understanding and hope, shares biblical truth, her own three-year separation, and real-time stories of brokenhearted couples. A must-read for anyone contemplating the end of their marriage. You may not fix your marriage, but God can!"
Elaine W. Miller, International speaker; author of We All Married Idiots: Three Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and Ten Things You Can
"When you open this book, you enter into an intimate conversation with a trusted friend. Linda Rooks warmly extends a hand of compassionate support to the brokenhearted spouse, offering both biblical hope and wisdom. With great purpose, she draws upon countless years of serving hurting spouses. We highly recommend Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated not only to spouses in crisis but to counselors, pastors, and other marriage champions."
Clint and Penny A. Bragg, Authors of Marriage Off Course: Trusting God in the Desert of Unwanted Separation or Divorce
"Linda Rooks not only understands what it means to fight for a marriage—she understands what it takes to win the war that separated couples face. The book you are about to read is filled with hope, direction, and 'Heart Work' exercises that will help guide you through whatever battle you are facing in your marriage. A tremendous book we will have on our resource list for every separated person."
Joe and Michelle Williams, Authors of Yes, Your Marriage Can Be Saved; founders of Marriage 911 God's Way Ministry
"As a counselor, I've witnessed firsthand the heartbreak of a person who wants to save his or her marriage with someone who has no interest in reconciling. Linda Rooks has not only successfully navigated this confusing, complicated path herself but offers hope through her true-life stories and excellent strategies. While making no guarantees, Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated lays out helpful do's and don'ts, showing that a restored marriage is possible."
Georgia Shaffer, PA Licensed Psychologist; professional certified coach; author; founder of ReBUILD, small-group internet coaching for the separated and divorced
"Anyone who is dealing with separation in marriage or works with those who are in deep marital distress can benefit from reading Fighting for Your Marriage While Separated. Linda Rooks shares her story of separation and reconciliation with vulnerability, encouragement, and hope. She doesn't offer a quick fix, but gives practical wisdom for navigating the difficulties, as if talking with you over a cup of coffee."
Nancy Kay Grace, Speaker; author of The Grace Impact; member of the board of directors for United Marriage Encounter; former presenter for United Marriage Encounter
"Fighting for your marriage is absolutely essential, even while separated! God has a process and a plan for our lives, and waiting and going through a wilderness period may be just that plan for a time. Linda's book is an incredible resource for walking this out, keeping you focused, and potentially waiting for God's direction for your marriage!"
Jeff & Cheryl Scruggs, Speakers; biblical counselors; authors of I Do Again; founders of Hope Matters Marriage Ministries and Thriving Beyond Belief podcast for women
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I am going through a separation right now and currently have a restraining order on my husband. This book helped me so much. I need to break the cycle we were in and turn to Jesus. I am praying for marriage reconciliation but before we can have that, my husband and I need to be reconciled to God, our Father.
The book provides practical advice and emotional support, especially for those who may feel hopeless or stuck. The author shows the importance of personal healing and spiritual growth during separation, encouraging readers to focus on self-reflection and change rather than controlling their spouse's actions. There are no quick fixes but instead she offers long-term strategies for personal growth, reconciliation, and rebuilding trust. She shares stories from her own experience and from others who have faced separation, creating a relatable and encouraging narrative. The step-by-step advice on communication, forgiveness, and setting boundaries is particularly helpful. It offers tools to manage conflict and rebuild intimacy, even when the relationship feels distant. Rooks' faith-based perspective adds an element of hope, particularly for Christian readers, though the advice is applicable to anyone facing marital difficulties. I would recommend this book to anyone who is separated from their spouse. Praying for all those who are struggling. God is in control and not you, so give it all to Him though painful.
There's no magic wand when you're hurting and in pain while separated. But there are comforting words from others that can help you feel better about your position. Actions speak louder than words and we all know that getting the opportunity to show these actions is what counts. I'm using some of the info in this book and it's helping me see a light at the end of the tunnel. Now all I can do is hope she's working for this as hard as I am.
My wife (Misty) and I are separated but this faith based book mentions multiple dynamics of why couples separate including a mirror image of our reasons. The writer (who herself was separated three years before reconciling) proceeds to discuss the root causes. She equips you with Godly advise on overcoming the strongholds in our life that lead to the separation. Having already benefited from faith based counseling this book reaffirmed many key points I already learned but also gives a fresh perspective on how to work toward reconciliation.
I never thought that I needed a book such as this during my time of separation from my spouse. It definitely gave me hope in all circumstances, reconciliation or divorce. It helped me to realize that I should focus on me, that I should focus on God and what he’s doing in my life, and not to put all my hope in faith into someone else’s decisions to be with me or not. We get one life to live, and it’s not going to be through waiting on a yes or a no from a spouse. This book saved my life.
My wife and I have been separated just over 2 months. This book has helped me sort through all the confusion and pain. It is a must have for anyone going through separation. Thank you so much Linda Rooks!! I really can't say enough about what a blessing your book is to me during this difficult time!
After being married for 16 years, my husband suddenly told me in 2018 that he no longer believed the Gospel and no longer loved me. It has been a very difficult 3 years since, but I’ve also learned a lot and grown much closer to God than ever before. One of the resources that has meant more than words can say to me throughout this process is this book by Linda Rooks. I highly recommend it!
Easy read. Good suggestions. Helping me through the process.
This book is for all couples before marriage, when it starts to fall apart, and after it falls apart. It teaches you so much about how to treat each other. This will help show you your failures and not just your spouse's if you read it with prayer and an open mind. No on is perfect after all.
This book spoke directly to the soul of my separation. I have given my marriage and spouse to God. I know he will perform a miracle whether restoration on my marriage or myself. Letting go is the hardest, but the best thing you can do in this situation and let God work.