What do we do with the sadness and the joy that living in a broken world brings to our lives? Most try to avoid the tears and focus on finding happiness, but does that really work? Denial might help to alleviate pain for the short run, but eventually lament must be faced and expressed. Learning to lament honestly to God is the surprising path to learning about real joy.
When we experience or see tragedy, we expect tears, fear, and sometimes anger, and when we experience the good and pleasant, we expect joy and maybe even laughter. However, laughter and lament are often found together in unexpected places. How can we explain the opposite effect—laughter in the pain and tears in the joy?
Steve Brown shares that speaking honestly about the ways we have been hurt and the ways we have hurt others opens the door to the joy of God's presence even as we grieve. Instead of pretending that everything is fine, going to God with all of our laments fills us with the freedom and joy of knowing his love and forgiveness. This is the surprising message of freedom that Christians have to share with a world where pain is almost always cursed and laughter is almost always cynical.
"Steve Brown is honest, hilarious, wise, and playful in speech, writing, and life. How often have we said, 'I laughed, I cried.' But seldom do we add, 'and I am transformed and fixed on Jesus.' This stunning book holds the heartache of the cross and the hilarity of the resurrection as the doorway for the kind of healing that will touch not only the heart but relationships, and even our polarized cultural travail. I promise you will laugh until you cry and then see your tears rise to praise. This book is a feast for healing."
Dan B. Allender, Professor of Counseling Psychology, The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology; author of Redeeming Heartache
"Vintage Steve Brown—earthy, honest, refreshingly self-deprecating, and relentlessly zeroed in on the good news of unearned divine favor. This book will fend off cynicism and foster joy as Steve coaches us all into a life of Christian realism—both happiness and anguish, both uproarious laughter and bristling anger. Healthy Christians experience both, and knowing this fortifies us to live life well."
Dane Ortlund, Senior Pastor, Naperville Presbyterian Church; author of Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers and Deeper: Real Change for Real Sinners
"Laughter and Lament breathes fresh air into the swirl of our emotions and points us to the freedom of learning our feelings aren't really even about us. They are signposts pointing us to the One who uses everything in our lives and wastes nothing in hope that we will become preoccupied with Jesus. This book gives tangible direction in the ups and downs of life to the promise of the gospel: it is for freedom we have been set free."
Sharon Hersh, Therapist; author of The Last Addiction and Belonging; speaker; professor
"I imagine Steve Brown smoking his pipe, inhaling in meditations of all of his life lessons, and exhaling that into this book. He shares something that matters to our humanity: the freedom in gritty lament, the laughter that rises from relinquishing our false notions of control, and the boldness to invite others into this love."
Aimee Byrd, Author of The Sexual Reformation and Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood
"Steve Brown is honest with us. He faces life as it is, and he finds reasons for both real laughter and true lament. For anyone with regrets about the past and fears for the future, Laughter and Lament: The Radical Freedom of Joy & Sorrow offers counsel from a wise friend who has seen it all."
Ray Ortlund, Renewal Ministries, Nashville, TN
"Christians are simultaneously saints, sinners, and sufferers. That means we have a lot to celebrate and a lot to cry about. In this book, my friend Steve Brown reminds us that the gospel sets us free to laugh and lament—sometimes at the same time. Laughter and Lament is a refreshing reminder that life is hard, Jesus is good, and God invites us to be honest about both."
Eric Schumacher, Author of Ours: Biblical Comfort for Men Grieving Miscarriage and Worthy: Celebrating the Value of Women (with Elyse Fitzpatrick)
"I have known Steve since he was my seminary professor a few decades ago. He has faithfully and repeatedly communicated the radical freedom that is accomplished because of the person and work of Christ and that grows in the soil of laughter and lament. The gift Steve gives us in this book is that God's promises to us of freedom, love, and forgiveness come with and through the surprising pairing of laughter and lament, confession and absolution, light and darkness, death and resurrection, and grief and hope. Steve invites us to grieve because we all suffer, and we suffer a lot. Steve only does that because he knows that there is hope since God is faithful and the suffering we experience, no matter how devastating, does not compare with the glory that will be revealed."
Justin S. Holcomb, Episcopal priest; seminary professor; author God With Us: 365 Devotions on the Person and Work of Christ
"Steve Brown's approach is one of a kind. Laughter and Lament could only be written by someone with Steve's experience, depth, and humor. This book is honest, meaningful, and hilarious at all the right times. Don't miss this gem. You'll learn to live and laugh with God like never before!"
Andrew Farley, Bestselling author; pastor; and radio host of The Grace Message with Dr. Andrew Farley
"Steve Brown deeply understands both laughter and lament, and he has written a book that treats our suffering seriously while lighting a way to actual, real-life joy. This isn't trite 'Christianese.' It's hard-won wisdom by the author who faithfully leads the procession toward a grace-filled life of freedom!"
Kendra Fletcher, Author of Lost & Found: Losing Religion, Finding Grace
"All of us have broken bones from our journey, but few figure out how to dance with them. Along comes Steve Brown with this candid and liberating instruction manual—encouraging us to authentically embrace the mysterious music of intermingled laughter and lament. I devoured this book and was also motivated to get back out on the dance floor, even if it's with a limp."
Matt Heard, Founder of THRIVE; author of Life with a Capital L: Embracing Your God-Given Humanity
"Steve Brown has done it again in Laughter and Lament, unpacking Scripture so powerfully that we're convinced there is no place that the grace of God does not triumph! 'Contrary to what you may have heard, the God of the universe will laugh and cry with you'—this is only a taste of the treasure of this book. Pick it up and you won't be able to put it down."
Pete Alwinson, Founder of Forge Men; speaker; author of Like Father, Like Son: How Knowing God as Father Changes Men
"I love this book. It's the best of the genre, read like a long conversation between friends. Steve's wisdom has been worth my full attention. You'll be challenged by his love and sound thinking and grace."
Robert Wolgemuth, Bestselling author of Lies Men Believe
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Right on point, life encompasses both laughter and lament and for good reasons. Love Steve Brown who always brings a reminder of how God's Grace is more than enough.
I appreciate Steve’s approach to scripture and his “one beggar leading another beggar” mentality. He is one of the smartest, least self-righteous teachers and pastors I’ve ever heard or read. I needed this book right here and right now. Lament before laughter makes more sense to me after reading this book. Thank you!
We are going to have tribulation in this world, Brown reminds us. John 16:33 promises it. But we will also have laughter because John 16:33 also promises Jesus has overcome the world. So how does a Christian live in both of these realms? Brown is old enough and been a faithful believer long enough that he has no desire to impress anybody. He is just real. In fact, he writes, “God's gift to his people is the freedom to be real...” (239/2151) That means we don't put on a religious face. We have permission to be authentic and express our feelings, our frustrations, our anger. “Jesus didn't die to make us nice,” he writes. (625/2151) We miss out on deep intimacy with God when we fail to share with him the depths of our pain and our joy. Brown says he is not interested in being particularly spiritual. He's been there, done that. He cusses. In fact, he teaches readers how to cuss in Latin. That way people will think you are terribly smart and not know at all you are cussing. Some may think Brown irreverent but I see a man old enough to quit at playing the act religious game. He's real with God and he is real with us. Reading this book will give you the freedom to be real with God. It will give you the freedom to express pain and genuine lament, real repentance and the freedom of laughter. But be ready to be honest and real. No phony people will appreciate Brown's book. I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.
We are going to have tribulation in this world, Brown reminds us. John 16:33 promises it. But we will also have laughter because John 16:33 also promises Jesus has overcome the world. So how does a Christian live in both of these realms? Brown is old enough and been a faithful believer long enough that he has no desire to impress anybody. He is just real. In fact, he writes, “God's gift to his people is the freedom to be real...” (239/2151) That means we don't put on a religious face. We have permission to be authentic and express our feelings, our frustrations, our anger. “Jesus didn't die to make us nice,” he writes. (625/2151) We miss out on deep intimacy with God when we fail to share with him the depths of our pain and our joy. Brown says he is not interested in being particularly spiritual. He's been there, done that. He cusses. In fact, he teaches readers how to cuss in Latin. That way people will think you are terribly smart and not know at all you are cussing. Some may think Brown irreverent but I see a man old enough to quit at playing the act religious game. He's real with God and he is real with us. Reading this book will give you the freedom to be real with God. It will give you the freedom to express pain and genuine lament, real repentance and the freedom of laughter. But be ready to be honest and real. No phony people will appreciate Brown's book.
I counted; this is the 8th book by this author that I have read since the beginning of my walk with Jesus. Early on, in my walk, I spent a whole lot of time in my car traveling from client to client, mostly in Florida. Steve Brown had a _ hour Bible study, usually on Moody Bible radio that I would find every time I was on the road. If you have ever heard his voice, you would recognize it. He has one of those perfect radio voices. What caught my attention with this author was his reality. I remember the first time I tuned in, before he began to teach, he always prayed, asked for forgiveness for the errors he was going to make and then started into scripture. At the conclusion of his segment, he would usually close by stating that 90% of what he just shared was right on target and the other 10% was probably wrong. He told his audience he didn’t know for sure what was accurate and not, so ask the Holy Spirit to sort it out for you and read it for yourself in God’s Word. That attitude always made me pay attention. The other reason I have followed this brother is because he’s real. He was a Presbyterian minister that finally fell in love with Jesus’ years after being in the ministry. His story is amazing, and God has had him preach, grace from the beginning of their relationship. He continues to point to grace and is attacked by many in the Church for his position, no matter if it’s the truth. So, what is this book about? In this book the author attempts to help the reader deal with the sadness and the joy that living in a broken world brings to our lives. He states that most of us try to avoid the tears and focus on finding happiness, but he assures us that we won’t find peace there. He points to denial and how we will use this technique to alleviate pain, but denial doesn’t work but maybe for the short term. He shows the reader that lament must be faced and expressed if we’re going to move forward and find joy. This book discusses how to lament honestly to God and tells us that this is the path to learning about real joy. In typically Steve Brown fashion, it’s an easy read. One might even believe he or she is sitting in a room having a one-on-one conversation about the joys and struggles of life, about the real world. Again, in typical Steve Brown fashion, he admits he, doesn’t have all the answers but his experience in life, (and he is old…) he has found truth in how we as Christ followers, can find the peace that Jesus promises and it’s not by running but by being honest. Speaking of being honest, the author asks the readers to listen to the old guy (himself) because he doesn’t care anymore. He’s comfortable now or at least isn’t worried about what anyone will say any longer. He’s just concerned about what Jesus would say. He makes an interesting statement in the introduction, “If you can find someone who doesn’t want power, or sex, or money, or leverage – someone who doesn’t give a fig about affirmation or criticism – listen to him or her. More often than not, you will hear truth, or at least the truth as that person sees it.” I think I have one or two souls in my life that are like this, and I am so grateful for them. I certainly want to be like this and I’m old enough now to be where Steve (the author) is. I just want to love people and help where I can. This book offers ten short chapters that walk the reader through times of lament and times of great joy. God is present in both. There were a couple of chapters that the Holy Spirit called my attention to. The first was, “Control: The Mother of all Addictions.” Oh, how I love to be in control, or believe I’m in control. I even buy the lie that I got this. This chapter reminded me again that God is sovereign and providential, and I am not. The second chapter I found helpful was, “The Sound of Silence.” The author begins with Psalm 46:10, “Be still and know that I AM God.” How many times do I need to be told this… I was reminded that when I can do nothing, do nothing. It’s called relinquishment, trusting God is in control. It’s alright to just be still. As always, there’s more but I hope this gives you a taste. As I began, this author has been used by God in my life for over 20 years now. I once many years ago, tried to meet him, but it wasn’t meant to be. I’m alright with that because I know I have eternity to track him down and laugh with him. I might even say, thanks brother. __
