Tired of trying to win approval and escape rejection? Peer pressure, codependency, shame, low self-esteem; these are just some of the words used to identify how people are controlled by others' opinions. Why is it so important to be liked? Why is rejection so traumatic?
Edward T. Welch's insightful, biblical answers to these questions show that freedom from others' opinions and genuine, loving relationships grow as we learn about ourselves, others, and God. This interactive book includes questions for individual or group study and is suitable for teenagers and young adults.
Edward T. Welch, MDiv, PhD, is a licensed psychologist and faculty member at the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation (CCEF). He earned a PhD in counseling (neuropsychology) from the University of Utah and has a Master of Divinity degree from Biblical Theological Seminary. Ed has been counseling for over thirty years and has written extensively on the topics of depression, fear, and addictions. His biblical counseling books include Shame Interrupted; When People Are Big and God Is Small; Addictions: A Banquet in the Grave; Depression: Looking Up from the Stubborn Darkness; Crossroads: A Step-by-Step Guide Away from Addiction; Running Scared: Fear, Worry, and the God of Rest; When I Am Afraid: A Step-by-Step Guide Away from Fear and Anxiety; Side by Side: Walking with Others in Wisdom and Love; and A Small Book about a Big Problem: Meditations on Anger, Patience, and Peace.
"Come have your desire for the love and praise of others re-ordered by this practical, well-written, and engaging book. By seeing God in his glory, and ourselves as bought with a price, we are freed to love others without the need to angle for their praise."
Alex Chediak, PhD, Associate Professor, California Baptist University; author of Thriving at College: Make Great Friends, Keep Your Faith, and Get Ready for the Real World!
"This book is life-giving. And since God gives us limited years on his earth, it's a book to read sooner rather than later! I wish I had this book forty years ago!"
Walt Mueller, Founder and President, Center for Parent/Youth Understanding; author of Engaging the Soul of Youth Culture
"Every time I am with Ed, I feel encouraged, listened to, challenged, and understood. This book does the same thing. He not only helps us deal with the major issues of life, but Ed brings Scripture alive to help us experience God's best for our lives."
Jim Burns, PhD, President, HomeWord Center for Youth and Family; author of Teenology and The Purity Code
"The years between fifteen and twenty-five occasion most of the important decisions in our lives. Questions about sexuality, career choice, education, and marriage are usually answered during this decade. How do we help students and young adults connect with the truth of the gospel rather than running after affirmation from others who use cultural expectations as their guidelines? Ed Welch points to Jesus: 'Jesus loved people more than he wanted to be loved by people. Jesus needed to love people more than he needed love from them.'"
Rod Mays, National Coordinator, Reformed University Fellowship (RUF)
"In What Do You Think of Me?, Ed Welch carefully, surgically, exposes people-pleasing for what it is. He lets it be ugly—all sin is ugly!—and offers a much more satisfying vision rooted in the finished work of Jesus Christ. Whether you are young or old (but especially if you are young) you would do well to give this book a read."
Tim Challies, Author of The Next Story and The Discipline of Spiritual Discernment; blogger at Challies.com
"As I read What Do You Think of Me? Why Do I Care?, I realized that it's all about eyes. In a riveting, real-life, raw way, Ed Welch provides a spiritual eye exam. In language that captures the heart and soul of every human being who ever longed to be known and accepted, Ed shows us what's normal, yet wrong, about our constant fear of the eyes of others. Then he gently, yet firmly, directs our gaze toward Jesus: all eyes on Jesus. That is the way of change. Finally, Ed points our focus onto others: they are our family who God equips us to love sacrificially. If you find that you're always living squinty-eyed, focused only on what others think of you, then read Ed's spiritual eye chart to see with clarity answers to your deepest questions about life and relationships."
Robert W. Kellemen, PhD, Executive Director, Biblical Counseling Coalition; author of God's Healing for Life's Losses
"The sin that so easily entangles us all—living in light of what other people think of us. Ed Welch's brilliant insights into this unavoidable struggle are exposed at a level that makes him a skillful surgeon of the heart. Welch invites us to reexamine the crux of the issue with a profound theology that is uniquely practical, informative, and gospel-centered. Working on the college campus where students live to impress other people, this book is now where I will turn to help pastor them through this struggle and embrace the fullness of the gospel that Welch so eloquently flushes out for us."
Alex Watlington, Reformed University Fellowship (RUF) campus pastor at Penn State University
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